Almost Famous

Matt really wanted me to write this story. I told it to him recently (when I was writing the "Brushed by Fame" post) and he had a.) never heard it. b.) Thought it was funny. and c.) thought I was slightly insane. I hesitated to write it. If I wrote it would people think I was bragging? Or incredibly crazy? Or be totally bored? Probably. So I am writing it for Matt, because I always do what my husband tells me to do.*

In my senior year in high school I was in Newspaper, like I had been the other two years. I was in with a great bunch of people and some really talented writers and cartoonists. I was the one they made Editor-in-Chief. I ended up sharing it with a girl because I didn't want ALL the responsibility and she really, really, REALLY wanted to put it on her transcripts and resumes and such. Whatever. I didn't bug me. I can share. So I was pretty happy in Newspaper.

Another part of being in Newspaper is that you are automatically enrolled in the Quill and Scroll Club. This was somewhat exciting to me. I wasn't really the type to join clubs, so I didn't mind it looking like a was socially active in high school, all while doing something I normally did (write.)

One day in September, the teacher, Mrs. Bryan, comes in and says each of the clubs had to vote on someone to represent the club for Homecoming Queen. They put up a list of girls people were suggesting. There were two. Me and Jenna Harris. Now I didn't mind this so much. I had been nominated for Sweethearts Queen and lost in a popular vote. So this was no concern for me. I was pretty sure I would loose.

Before we voted, she explained what would happen. Whoever won the club vote would then be put up for popular vote. The top 12 girls or so would then move on to the next round. A Beauty Pageant. They would be required to have a formal dress, a talent and answer a question. Say what? You lost me at Pageant. No, no, no! I don't DO things like that. (While I could do it at this age, at 17 I was horror struck.)

So the club voted. I, of course voted for Jenna. Because I'm not insane. However, I lost. I mean won. I was the representative of the club. A friend looks over at me, who had apparently been peeking and said I was the only won who voted against myself. Whhhhaaat? Are these people insane?

So you may be wondering at this point just WHY I was so against it. I could do the dress. I could answer a lame question, but there were two reasons I could not do it, in my mind. Firstly, I didn't have a date. With my luck I would win the thing and be the first Homecoming Queen without a date. Or just as bad, a Princess without a date. It was bad enough I didn't have one, but to MAKE me go to all the hoopla and do it alone!** Now that seemed mean.

Secondly, I had no talent. I am not saying that I was talentless. But my talents tend to be table talents or rather, unperformable talents. I would sit and imagine the scene unfolding before my eyes. I could either a.) write an article for everyone to see, boring, b.) Pull someone from the audience and do a quick sketch, lame, c.) make my best attempt at "singing" and break glass in the process or d.) play "twinkle, twinkle" on an instrument. I was really considering playing water filled cups. I think the Miss America at the time had that as her talent. None of these were working for me. Although in a pinch I think I would have sketched someone.

No, no. I could not do this. Please, Heavenly Father. I know I never win anything I want to win. Please, do not let THIS be the time that I do. For about a week, I walked by the lunchroom and see MY NAME posted on the wall to vote on. I was always filled with a sense of dread. My mom was thrilled for me (I mean really, I would feel the same if it was Ally or Lauren.) But I would cry. CRY. (What was wrong with me?)

So yes, in the end I lost. I did not go to the pageant. And do you know what? I was sad. Yet still strangely elated. I really didn't want to do it, but I was sad I lost. Somewhere deep, DEEP, DEEP down inside, I kind of wanted to try. If that makes sense.

In the end, a cheerleader won. I mean really. What was I thinking? How could I have ever competed with a cheerleader? I don't know why I even worried.***


*Disclaimer: This is a lie. I never do what people tell me to do, only what they ask for.
**Had I really tried I could have gotten a date. I did DATE in high school, but never to a dance.
***No offense intended to any former cheerleaders. But you all win everything in high school.